The No.1 tip our Matchmakers want you to know when looking for a serious relationship.
Dateworks Matchmakers meet singles from all walks of life. Every day, they encounter singles of all ages who come in with their own unique set of strengths, weaknesses and challenges. Over the years, our matchmakers have realised that there is 1 thing which is essential when you are looking for a serious relationship. Clients who work on this have a higher success rate than those who don’t.
When it comes to improving certain aspects of your life like your career, education or health, you usually know exactly what your plan is. In the same way, do you know what you have to do when looking for a serious relationship? Have you thought about the important details?
Our certified matchmakers say the No. 1 thing to do is to have a Dating Plan for yourself when looking for serious relationships. Let me tell you more. I would like to break it down into 3 parts.
What is a dating plan when looking for a serious relationship?
A dating plan is a rough outline which you should create if you are looking for a serious relationship. It can be as simple as a written list, or if you prefer, you can draw a mind map or create an excel sheet. Whichever you fancy. A dating plan is simply your very vision of what you aspire your future relationship to be. What are you looking for? What qualities matter to you. It is important to have an idea of what you want in your future partner. When creating a dating plan, our matchmakers suggest asking yourself these 3 questions.
What are my priorities?
What am I willing to negotiate?
What are my deal breakers?
Relax in a quiet place with your favorite drink while you answer these questions as honestly as possible. Take extra time to think about yourself deeply. It will be well worth your time. Make sure to do so without any 3rd party influencing your thoughts and ideas.
Why have a dating plan when looking for a serious relationship?
A dating plan compels you to get clear about yourself and your future relationships. You need to know and understand yourself well in order to know what you are looking for in a partner. The more details you list off the better. As they say, the devil is in the detail. Our matchmakers often find that people get into relationships without having an idea of what they want. This causes a lot of conflict and even heartache as the relationship progresses.
Having a dating plan helps you to identify your challenges. Once identified, you will be able to create strategies to overcome these challenges. For example, if you know a challenge you have is being a bit brash at times. A simple strategy could be to take 10 deep breaths before you respond. In actual fact, a dating plan is very useful. It gives you hope when challenges come your way. It can help you to stay positively focused on your big dream. Remember not to pressure yourself too much too fast though. Slow and steady wins the race.
Matchmakers Bonus tip when looking for a serious relationship :
Be everything you are looking for. This may sound strange but it is the foundation of strong serious relationships. As you may very well know, you get what you give.
It is a concept which is simple to understand but hardly put into practice. Our Matchmaker Charmaine Goh shares a few examples. If you want someone who communicates well, make sure you communicate well. Practice expressing yourself clearly in front of the mirror for 2 minutes everyday.
Similarly, if you want someone who dresses well. Start by dressing yourself well first.
And as a final example, if you want someone who is smart and funny, make sure you are well read and have a great sense of humor yourself.
Having a solid and well thought out dating plan is the most essential tool you can give yourself when looking for a serious relationship. That said, a dating plan is not written in stone. It is merely an outline to guide you. The main purpose of your dating plan is to prepare and equip you in order to attract your future partner. When life does throw you a curveball (as it surely will) at least you will be prepared.
This new year, I hope our matchmaker’s top tip helps as you embark on a renewed dating journey. I hope you do give this a try as you kick start the new year. Start making your Dating Plan now and see what you actually discover. It will definitely be interesting.