Traditionally, especially in Asia, prime importance was placed on self sacrifice and righteousness. (It may very well still be the case). In the past, with generations before, it was something which was expected without question. Sometimes, these responsibilities were carried out at the cost of one’s own happiness and physical or mental well being. You would have been expected to take on responsibilities, traditions, and even sacrifice your personal time to care, nurture and be there for others. Even saying no or setting boundaries was and maybe still is heavily frowned upon.
Learning to Love Yourself
Thankfully, (and finally!) there seems to be a wave of change. A wave of hope might I say. The concept of self love is being given importance as more and more people are burning out from stress, mental pressure and undue responsibilities especially post pandemic. There is more focus on a sense of balance and enjoyment in life. Cue, self love. A concept which is gaining more popularity. A concept which is much needed in our busy bustling lives. Learning to love yourself and the art of self love is truly a life-changer.
Personally, it has taken many years for me to learn and understand how I love myself directly impacts the quality of my relationships. How I choose to treat myself, the words I use for myself and the time I take to nurture myself actually teaches my partner and loved ones how to love and treat me. I really do believe that self love is at the crux of developing any healthy relationship.
Definition of Self Love
Self love can be defined in a few ways, depending on each individual. For me, self love helps me appreciate my own worth or value. It includes giving time and attention to my own happiness and well-being. Self love is a closely related component to one’s self esteem, self confidence and general outlook of life. What about you? Have you ever thought about what self love means to you? How would you define it?
How to Love Yourself
Here are my top 10 questions to ask yourself. Answer these honestly.
1. What do I like about myself?
2. Is my self-talk kind or am I too hard and harsh on myself?
3. Am I forgiving myself and learning from my mistakes?
4. Am I appreciating my beauty when I look at myself in the mirror?
5. What are 2 things I would do for myself if time and money was not a factor?
6. Am I taking the time to nurture my own growth and interests?
7. If I remove my partner, job, and material possessions, how would I feel?
8. Are my daily habits nurturing my mind, body and overall well being?
9. Do I take time to celebrate my achievements? No matter big or small.
10. Am I creating a space for myself to be happy and healthy?
“How you love yourself is how you teach
others to love you.”– Rupi Kaur
Your honest answers will help guide you towards your own happiness and personal growth which really is at the core of any healthy relationship. What steps can you take? What support do you need? A healthy relationship stems from your connection to yourself, your own willingness to grow and your outlook on life. If you don’t love, connect with and inspire yourself, how will you do the same with your partner?
Self Love for a Healthy Relationship
Only when you love, trust and have confidence in yourself, will you be able to be a better partner. Your self love will spill over into your relationship. A healthy relationship starts with you.
I hope you find your way to more self love. Our life coaches and matchmakers are always at your service to work through and help you cultivate healthy relationships.